I Wanna Party With You: Halloween Edition

30 Oct

Sometimes, you don’t really get to know what someone is really about until you can sit down, loosen the tie, and toss a couple back with them.  So whenever a particular group of people have piqued our interest here at DS, we figure the best way to learn more about them, and ourselves, is to take a look at what it would be like to party with them.  It’s social science, if you will.  This is I Wanna Party With You.  It’s heavy stuff.

Halloween Parties

The week or so before Halloween is prime party season.  A magical, party-friendly atmosphere is created by the confluence of a couple different factors:  1) the cooling temperatures give the night air a little extra zip, making those early fall nights feel refreshing and a bit dangerous,  2) Halloween is a pretty universal concept that everyone can use for an excuse to party, to the point that people will feel left out if they’re not there, and 3) there are costumes everywhere.

It’s factor number 3 that makes Halloween parties some of the more unique and absurd events on the year’s social calendar.  Costumes for Halloween provide an opportunity for people to shed their normal insecurities along with the shackles of social decorum and proceed to let their freak flags fly – behind the safety net of the fact that nearly everyone else is doing it.

It’s interesting that even though young kids are typically pretty riled up when it comes to dressing up for Halloween, it’s when people enter their later teens and adulthood that they start spending the most time and energy on costume decisions.  There usually seems to be a period of indifference to the idea of Halloween costumes around middle school and high school, but as kids start to get introduced to the fun-stifling constructs of the adult world, and as the definition of ‘party’ drastically changes, the motivation and possibilities of dressing up in costume strengthen and expand.

As you get older, you can start to appreciate the unique allure behind showing off some imagination and maybe looking extra-sexy while hanging out with a bunch of people doing the same.  Costumes are one big X-factor thrown into every Halloween party, and if you’re a fan of parties, you know how much better they can be with X-factors in the mix.

Coming into the chilly Halloween season this year, we’re going to take a look at a few of the more common X-factor outfits (read: costumes) that you, as a legal adult, maybe come into contact with this year.  Or you may be already planning on doing one or more of these ideas, and if so, we mean little to no offense for the following opinions.

 

Magic Mike

There are two possible avenues that a fellow could take to get to this particular costume choice.  The first could be a fully irony-free, bright-eyed, oiled-up, and fake-tanned embrace of the Magic Mike image.  This could be a gentleman who hits the gym daily and sees an opportunity to show the ladies that he can offer up the guns-and-washboard package just like the Chan-man can.  These guys’ lack of self-awareness, reliance on shiny graphic tees, and propensity for rage bursts could definitely be a party downer.

The other approach to MM time could throw some irony into the concept.  The ‘I know this is ridiculous, but I see the laughter behind Chan-man’s version of “Pony” and I want to join in on that brand of ridiculousness.  There’s bonus points given if they body type of said fellow is nowhere near that of Mike’s.  Just don’t look for too long.

Good Party Meter:

6/10

Presidential Candidate

With 2012 being an election year, there will probably be a few faux-presidential candidates running around out there.  Many of these topical revelers will go with the standard business suit-and-mask costume.  You know the masks – big rubber caricatures of presidents often used in cinematic bank robberies.  So far it seems like Obama masks are the most common ones, but we know Romney’s out there.

These masks are generally creepy even if you just see them hanging up on a shelf in some costume store, and when you put it on some drunk person you don’t really know at a house party you may or may not feel 100% safe at, it’s going to be a party buzz-killer.  Are they looking at you or at the person to your left?  Are those muffled sounds coming from behind the mask a request for more ice, or are they making a lewd come-on that you should be taking as a sign to get the hell out of the room?  Just lose the mask.  You’re making everyone feel weird.

Good Party Meter:

1/10

Breaking Bad

Another buzzy piece of entertainment that will inspire some costumes this year is Breaking Bad.  The most common of these will probably be the yellow jumpsuit and gas mask combination that Walter White and Jesse Pinkman wear to cook their very special brand of blue meth.  If someone is out wearing this particular costume, it says a couple of things about them that give a promising indication of their party abilities.

First, they are promoting an amazing series, and they have good taste.  Second, they are okay with a little grittiness, hence the drug references, and as long as this is not a lot of grittiness, that adds some flavor to the proceedings.  Third, if it’s a lady in a yellow suit, they have all of the above, plus a sense of humor about things, and the self-confidence to pull it all off.  Check, check, check.

Good Party Meter:

7/10

Replacement Ref

This would have been a cool choice for about two days a couple of months ago.  Unfortunately, there will be a decent amount of partygoers this Halloween who didn’t get that particular vibe from this costume choice, and will push forward in an attempt to be topical with some zebra stripes and zany accessories.

The party problems this indicates is that this person has a thudding sense of humor and probably doesn’t get out much.  Also, after a few Zimas, they will most likely start blowing on a whistle or doing severe hand motions that will get old midway through the first time it happens.  If it’s a lady who is wearing a ref shirt and nothing else, we’ll reconsider adding a couple of points.  But still.

Good Party Meter:

3/10

80s

In the past several years, the 80s have seen a widespread costume resurgence to the point that a college 80s aerobics-themed party is no longer just a cliche – it’s an expected tradition.  So whoever goes the 80s route for their costume will more than likely be getting a big 0 for originality.  That’s a zero.  When it comes to communicating and facilitating a debauched, no-holds-barred party energy, however, the 80s are second-to-none.

Try putting on a serious 80s party costume and then not having at least a tiny urge to get out there and dance your ass off to New Wave with other 80s-themed cuties.  It’s pretty tough to resist it.  The other solid thing about the 80s decision is that you’ll run out of parties before you run out of costume options.  Barely.  There’s 80s rocker, wrestler, skier, prom, wedding, fitness, porn star, prep school, beach day….

Good Party Meter:

8/10

 

Party On…

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